Ok so this was like a mamoth story to do so I'm just glad it's done at the moment without looking at it critically. There are various things I want to improve such as the type 'gateway' - for which there's obviously a week left to do this!
For publsihing reasons I may cut the 3rd page as it doesn't really contribute to the overall narrative other than adding antisipation and atmosphere, this would also make it a nice even 10 pages instead of 11.
If you could let me know what you think that would be great, thanks!
P.S. chiu have a great hol and xmas!!!